Alright.... that took quite a while, now it's on to the future and all the things I'm working on currently. So this blog will probably change a little now.
I am going to use it now as much to upload works in progress as anything. As well as to vent a little from time to time. Basically it will take the place of my livejournal which I only use now to keep up on some of my favorite artists who have blogs there.
This blog does much more than that one feature wise.
So now for a little venting:
Tonight I'm exhausted, it was a very long and stressful day. I took my grandmother to the doctor it was just one of those days where everything was off center. She had left her phone on so I couldn't get a hold of her, didn't know if maybe she had canceled it because she thought Em and I were sick instead of Bill. Or if something worse had happened so I called Art to check on her and I rushed down there.
Then Bill wanted to keep Em since I was going down there so I had to get all Ems stuff and her ready last minute. Then they moved grandmas doctors office to a new building and no one told either one of us so we had to search for it. then her health just keeps winding down, she's forgetting stuff, not eating right, messing up her medicines. The doctor basically tells her every time she's too weak to have any kind of surgery on her knee and hip, which is true, but it depresses her and it would solve so much of her pain. It's a vicious circle.
I feel like I'm witnessing a car crash in slow motion and there's nothing I can do about it when it comes to my grandmother. Put that with everything else going on and it's just exhausting. It makes me angry and resentful that I am the only one left. This should not be all up to me. Why did they all have to die? Life just isn't fair, and it's not fair that my grandma should have to go through this all either. Why did she have to lose her husband and all her children and now have to go through this too? With just me? Hell, this is why religion is such bullshit. I'm starting to think sometimes that it's not such a good deal to grow old.
Quem di diligunt, adolescens moritur- whom the gods love die young.
I could think of a few others but I'm going to try to get out of this train of thought. Just had to get it out somewhere.
I'm trying to get a second wind tonight so I can get some more progress on the new piece, I actually took a nap a bit ago. Now I have 3 days to myself, though I miss having Emily with me, she's my only companion pretty much these days.And it's not that I don't have a couple days alone a week anyways, but usually I work and then am just too tired to really work on art. This week was really messed up. So now I get to just do what I want pretty much, which is draw of course! So yeah, I'm going to so sleep in tomorrow, then I'll start posting new art! Yes! That's a good thing.
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